We cry the same tears, We scream the same screams
by punkispurple
Summary: Goten's heart still dwells in the past. Can anyone help him before it is to late?
1. Sinking into the Deep

Disclaimer: I don't own DB, DBZ or DBGT. I never have, probably never will. I don't want to own it, I would never have come up with such cool characters (e.g Mirai Trunks and Goten) Nor such a great story line. It belongs to Akira Toriyama and Funimation. How ever I made the plot up, title and any characters that are made up, in later chapters. ^_^.  
  
  
  
  
  
We cry the same Tears, We scream the same screams  
  
Trunks looked at Goten, his face still in the same expression, it had been in for the past three days, determined, there was no way on earth he was going to let Buu kill everyone he'd had every known for his whole life. The only time he had smiled was when trunks told him that they were going draw out Majjin Buu's death, but even then, it was not a true smile. His innocence had been lost, somewhere deep down the old Goten was hiding and where ever he was, he was crying. Perhaps it was behind his broken heart or underneath his tortured soul, he had been hidden or rather he was lost and sometimes people are never found. Inside he felt like he had been torn apart, his heart destroyed, something was missing, it was as if a hole was in him, one that sucked out all the happiness. He wanted to wake from this nightmare, wanted to find it all just to be a dream, but he knew it was real; it was not just a delusion. On the outside he couldn't cry, it wasn't that he didn't want too, he couldn't. On the inside he was crying, he was screaming and crying. He remembered when Vegeta had told him "Only the weak cry, brat. Though you are kakarotts son, so it would explain why." Goten knew Vegeta had changed since then, but still Goten had always believed that. Weak was believing in this lie. Goten had trained so hard in his time so far in the hyperbolic time chamber, never giving up, even when he exhausted, even when he was hungry, he wouldn't stop, sometimes Trunks had, had to force him to eat, drag him to his bed, when he had collapsed. Trunks did not blame him though, but he was finding it hard to keep up with Goten's regime, it had never been like that before, it was always Goten struggling. Goten was pushing him self even harder than Trunks thought was possible. His sole purpose now was to kill Buu. Trunks counted himself lucky he still had his mom and at least had known his dad. Goten laughed, but he knew it was false, it wasn't laugh from his heart, noting was going to make happy like that again. He would never see his big brothers smile again, or hear his mom moan at him in the same way; it would never be the same. At least he did not see his brother's death but his mothers he would never forget that, it would remain with him forever.  
  
*~*~*~*~*Start of Flash Back*~*~*~*~* Goten watched helplessly as his mother approached Majjin Buu, she slapped him across the face. "You savage, do you even care if you killed my son?" She screamed at him, he voice filled with strife. Buu made no reply. "Look at me when I'm speaking to you." Goten watched in terror as Buu's eyes moved to look at his mother. "Do you like eggs?" He asked but didn't wait for a reply. A blinding pink light, shone through the look out, it died away as quickly as it had came, in his mother place was a small white egg. Buu walked over to it and stomped on it. "Aaaaahhhhhhh ah, my mother." He sniffed while crying. Suddenly anger started to course through Goten's blood as the shock wore off. "I'll get you, you stupid beast!" He shouted, enraged, his Sayian instincts taking over. "NO Goten.You go down there, were all dead." Piccolo said quietly. What he had said held him back, they would all be dead, even Trunks, no he had to avenge his family. "But mom was all I had left." He said aloud to no one. "Goten" Trunks sighed in sympathy, but no other words could come out of his mouth. It was first time he had seen someone die. *~*~*~*~*End of Flash Back*~*~*~*~* "Goten, come on you gotta eat something!" Trunks protested. "Will you give it a rest already?" "But Trunks, I've gotta keep training, I gotta beat Buu, I'm gunna make him pay for what he did to, Mom, Gohan and your dad." "But it no good not eating, your just going to kill yourself in the process." "Uh fine Trunks. I'll eat but then I'm going back to training after." "Whatever." 'What's up with Goten, he usually loves food.' Trunks thought to himself. Trunks did not realise that his friend had changed so much, in a space of hours. Through the rest of the following days until their battle with Majjin Buu, Goten had appeared to become happier, he would laugh and smile. So to Trunks Goten had gotten over his mothers death, but the real reason behind this smile was he was plotting Majjin Buu's death. Trunks had convinced him to make a show of it. Hate had taken over the both of the younger Z fighters. 


	2. Is this abyss disappearing?

Disclaimer: I don't own DB/DBZ/DBGT. There owned by Akira Toriyama and Funimation. A/N sorry if the event in this chapter are not totally in order, sorry I haven't updated in sooner, I've had really busy couple of weeks.^_^ Also I know this seems like mainly Time struggle, The super Moves of Gotenks and the episodes after that rewritten. This is on their feelings, also I had to put this in other wise it would not explain some of the stuff later on in the story. I promise the next chapter will be way better! I also intended to do this in one part, but I decided to do this then after they get out of the time chamber after, coz I'm really busy until next Sunday. Oh yeah sorry if offend anybody my saying things about their favourite character. I'm just trying to look at it from Gotenks view, he has a lot of err. pride. Before I forget, thanks for reviewing, I didn't expect anyone too!  
  
  
  
Is the abyss disappearing?  
  
"Where is he?" Buu asked as walked through the door. Trunks eyes narrowed, could not he recognise him and Goten separately, He must have to even more stupid than he thought.  
  
"You ready, Goten?  
  
"Yeah!"  
  
"What about Buu?"  
  
"Doesn't look it!"  
  
Cool, let's do this!"  
  
"Those kids?" Buu questioned. Goten stood offended how could he not recognise the boy whose mother he had killed.  
  
"Yeah that's right." Piccolo said gruffly. He doubted these boys could destroy Buu, but then again one of them was the son of Goku and the other Sayian Prince.  
  
"All that training and Piccolo's the only one that came to watch us. Why didn't anyone else come?" Trunks pouted, it would be so much more fun with an audience.  
  
"Where is the fighter?" Buu asked again. It was obvious he didn't believe Piccolo.  
  
"It's them!" he growled.  
  
"We might not have a good audience but let's still give a good show." Trunks said prideful. He wanted to get revenge big time, nobody forced his Father to kill himself.  
  
"Mmmmhm"  
  
"This is the end for you!" Trunks shouted stating the routine, him and Goten had made up.  
  
"Majjin Buu!" Goten continued pointing at Bibadis creation. "Don't you think it's a little bit stupid that I just say Majjin Buu?" Goten said getting angry about being left out.  
  
"You had a few more lines there. It's not my fault my fault if you can't remember your lines." Trunks snapped at Goten, those words stung him. It wasn't his fault he had other things on his mind, like perhaps not having any family apart from his Grandpa.  
  
"Lets begin." Buu said, not giving Goten a chance to speak back to chance.  
  
Looks like the bad guys getting impatient. Should we show him our moves?" Trunks mocked.  
  
"Oh alright." Goten sighed moodily, he wasn't in the mood for this.  
  
"Ready?"  
  
"Let's go!" Before either of the young demi sayians could make a move Buu struck Trunks. Goten gaped at him, every one knew you didn't hit an opponent before they were ready, it just wasn't fair.  
  
"Owwwww. What's wrong with you? You can't just come swing it like that without any warning! Don't you know what a sucker punch is? That's something only inexperienced fighters do. Do you understand what I'm saying? Were trying to prepare here to give you a fair fight, so why don't you try some patience. Now were going to power up. You stand there and be quite. Lets try this thing again. Ready? Trunks screamed while rubbing his face. Buu sure did have one mean punch.  
  
"Fuuuuuu.siooooooon.haaaaaaaaaaa." A bright light consumed the two young warriors and when it had finally dissolved it revealed, Gotenks.  
  
Gotenks stood in front off Majjin Buu. A Smirk spread wide across his face. Though he was only just over half the size of Majjin Buu in height, his true power wasn't, Piccolo and Buu didn't need to know that. yet. He was going to make Buu suffer. So the fight began, a mix or verbal and physical proceeded.  
  
Each Blow that reached Buu seemed to shrink the abyss inside of him. Each time Buu hit back the pain grew, Physically, yes he could deal with that. It was the emotional suffering, it was starting to break him down. He was being torn apart. Each hit mage his pride stronger, but then again this was all an act to him, a game. There was no one to stop him now, he even had his own personal punching bag, so what if it fought back, it was all the more fun! Piccolo was seemingly getting angrier and angrier with Gotenks, why wasn't he using his full power with Buu, even he could see that Buu was just toying with him. After trying several more attacks, he knew weren't going to work he went Super Sayian. The warm golden energy numbed some of the pain, giving him an even larger ego. the fighters continued on their barrage of kicks, punches and ki blasts.  
  
"Cosmic Halo" Gotenks shouted in his dual tone Voice. This had been Goten's idea for an attack. Ever since he had seen the yellow halo that hung around his fathers head, he had thought it was cool. So then he had decided to honour him. He was sure his brother and mother would have one of them too. There was no better way, in Goten's eyes, to inflict pain to Buu. A halo was a sign of good, his mother said Angels had halos. He was respecting his family and getting revenge, killing two problems with one stone.  
  
Gotenks fist tightly clenched together, his smirk grew even wider as he saw Majjin Buu struggle against the Bright ring of Ki energy. Suddenly Buu stopped, Gotenks froze, he didn't like the look on Buu's face. Gotenks had been telling him about how good it was feeling, Buu was ruining his fun. As the Golden Halo shattered so did Goten's little piece of happiness. He had known it wouldn't defeat Buu but he should have at least got a scratch off it. His mouth hung open in shock, this wasn't fair.  
  
Soon Gotenks's main attack had become the Super Ghost Kamekaze attack. This attack was also to do with remembrance, though this one more to do with trunks side then Goten. When Trunks was little, his father had told him ghost stories, in the hopes of making him braver, this did work and exactly the way Vegeta had wanted it too. Trunks now had an attitude similar to Vegeta's. Trunks had thoroughly enjoyed these stories, Goten had said they were scary, but this attack was in memory of those stories that he feared he'd never hear again.  
  
The look alike ghost flew around the hyperbolic time chamber, a wicked grin could be saw on his face. "Do I scare you?" He cackled white orbs of Ki energy floating around him. The ghost flew at Buu at Gotenks order, Buu prepared himself for attack but at touch the ghost exploded, causing Buu to become a lump of goo. When Goten thought about how Buu looked, it was how he felt, all twisted, demented and misshapen. Buu soon recovered from this attack though while the effects had lasted, it had made the Goten inside of Gotenks feel a bit better. He spat another ten ghosts and started to plan. The ten ghosts were doing a number of different things, some talking, other daydreaming and two even sleeping. "Hey wake up. Line up. Arms out and forward." Gotenks yelled.  
  
"Hey pal, not so close. We'll explode if we touch you know."  
  
"Yeah. In your case it would be an improvement." Jested the other ghost.  
  
"Hey. I never said you could talk did I?" Gotenks was getting easily annoyed, he wanted to get this over with, or a least half of him did. He was fed up of the chatter. "One"  
  
"Two"  
  
"Three"  
  
"Four"  
  
"Five"  
  
"Six"  
  
"Seven"  
  
"Eight"  
  
"Nine"  
  
"Ten" Came the assortment of voices, some sounding like either Goten or Trunks, while others in a range of high and low pitched voices, when Gotenks had told then to sound off. Sending ghosts one and two off to attack Buu, he soon found that Buu learnt there trick, dodging both of their attack. He had plot another way for Buu's demise. What was Buu's weak spot, he needed time to think. What had he turned Chi Chi into, food and every one else was foods it had to be his weak spot. He gathered round the remaining eight Ghosts and started to form a plan. "We can give him indigestion!" suggested one ghost.  
  
"Make his pop like a balloon." Another one chuckled. The aren't half bad at making plans, but then again they are modelled after me. Gotenks thought.  
  
"It'll be easy, coz he's already full of hot air."  
  
"Ok I want three, four, five, six and seven, fly at Buu, but then at the last second, swerve to the left and pretend to see some food on the floor. A cookie or something. Wait till the fool comes over then go for his neck. Got it?" "Yes sir!" "Numbers ten, nine and eight. Stay with me I want you to go after him after they have blown him up." Gotenks instructed in a whisper so Majjin Buu couldn't hear. This plan is Perfect, Gotenks smirked. Buu was getting his Just desserts, literally.  
  
"Good Luck buddy!"  
  
"Lets do it!" Two of the ghosts shook hands and exploded instantly in a burst of golden light.  
  
"That was the wrong idea. Ok. Forget those idiots. Every one else carry out the attack. Ten stay with me." Gotenks growled.  
  
Gotenks grinned as he watched Buu fall helplessly for his plan, the idiot. That would have hit him a mile away. He watched as the ghosts went at him, giving Buu no chance to escape. The look of terror on his face was priceless, he needed a camera now.  
  
"Don't celebrate just yet, wait till the smoke clears." Piccolo whispered. Gotenks was astounded at Piccolos stupidity. Why did he think he'd kept number ten with him.  
  
"It's up to you now ten. Fly down Buu's throat and give something to really chew on!" Gotenks cackled as the dust cleared.  
  
"Yes sir." The ghost shot down Buu's throat making Buu explode into tens of pieces of withering Goo. He was destroyed just as Gotenks heart had been broken, but then maybe his heart wasn't all that broken. After Gotenks had cleaned up all the mess, Buu had made and of course a lot of bragging about how great he Gotenks was. Even Piccolo had praised him.  
  
"Where this wind coming from!" Gotenks shouted as the element nearly blew him over. "That smoke it's coming together."  
  
"It's him, Majjin Buu." Piccolo stuttered in shock.  
  
"Oh good, he's come back some more." Gotenks smirked; time to put stage 2 of his plan into action. "Errrr this time do you have any ideas for me. I've tried every think and I'm fresh out." Piccolo hadn't seemed to hear Gotenks 'plea' and was looking up at a chuckling Buu. "Uh oh, I don't like that look in his eyes!" Gotenks carried on.  
  
"It's not enough. We blasted him into to molecules and he still had enough energy to have him reborn. It's my fault I thought by luring him in here, you would have the advantage you need to destroy him. I put too much faith in you. Can you do another one of those 'Super Ghost Kame Kaze attacks?" Gotenks looked at Piccolo, broken pride in his eye's he almost regretted what he had done, but this was still part of the plan. He'd got Piccolo think he was out of ideas. "Go on do it!" Piccolo shouted. Pretending to gather all his ki up he screamed. "Some things wrong. I can't find the power to do that trick again. The world going to end."  
  
Majjin Buu seeing his chance grabbed Gotenks by the ankle with his head tentacle. The blows that proceeded were even more of a show to Gotenks. A very painful show, but none the less it was working!  
  
"Let go of me ugly." The super Sayian growled. "Hey that hurt." He said finally managing to break free from Buu tight grip. "So you wanna play rough do you. Well Ding ding ding. Let's see you pull yourself out this one." A loud blast interrupted from Gotenks bragging more. Both Buu and Gotenks turned around to find the entrance a smouldering wreckage of twisted metal and shattered glass. "Uh- oh, He shot the entrance how come?" He wondered allowed. Piccolo eyes were burning with hate, yet fear still hidden within them. "Now you're stuck in hear for good. Now you're trapped. You are indeed stronger than Gotenks and I but it doesn't matter anymore. Your going to spend the rest of your life in here." "Umm Piccolo, were stuck here?" Gotenks's winded in shock as Piccolo replied yes. He would never be able to see his families again, not until he died. He would never hear his mothers ranting at him. Tears filled his green eyes, this wasn't the way he wanted to die, this was truly being beaten. Even his secret technique couldn't help him now. "But Piccolo. Is it true that there is really no way out of this place?" Gotenks asked again in shock. "Yes that was the only exit and now it's gone. It's gone Buu!" Piccolo seemed to be speaking more to Buu than Gotenks. Gotenks was the one that needed comfort now, not that Pink piece of Goo. He couldn't believe that his own brother had said he had comforted him, Piccolo was more concerned with Buu, not him.  
  
"How do we candy?" Buu stammered in utter shock.  
  
"We don't there's none here." Piccolo said calmly, he was going to be all right he only needs water, but Gotenks, Gotenks needed food.  
  
"No ice cream, no chocolate!"  
  
"Nothing all gone." Gotenks grabbed a hand full of the green sand that once belonged in the time glass at the entrance and watched as it ran through his fingers. His life was slowly ebbing away, every moment in this room he would be wasting away.  
  
"Who told you to lock us in here? For your information I still have my best technique." Gotenks yelled, letting his anger out.  
  
"You what! I thought you said you had no strength left and your power had reached the limit."  
  
"I was just making the fight more fantastic. If you had of left it, we would be out of hear now. You Buffoon" Gotenks reasoned.  
  
"What kind of Kid are you? You put the world at risk just to be more 'fantastic'. You idiot." Piccolo argued, not even Vegeta would do that.  
  
"You're the idiot who blew up the door, so your idiot who gets us out of here, or I'll use my new technique on you!" Gotenks threatened.  
  
"There is no way out of here. The only way out has been blown up. It is gone, gone!"  
  
"Want candy. Want candy. Let me out. Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!" Buu's screams ripped through the two different dimensions, throwing Piccolo and Gotenks back into the wreckage. "What is that hole?" Gotenks asked startled. "A tare in the dimensions. Some how he's made a rip in time and space. If he enters he'll destroy the earth. Majjin Buu fight me! Piccolo pleaded, but he was to late Majjin Buu was already jumping through the hole. "The holes closing!" Gotenks yelled running for it. "Let's get out of here! Come on!" It was to long the hole had sealed and they were still stuck in the chamber with no way out. 


	3. A Young Child sits here!

Disclaimer: I do not own DBZ. A/N: I did not like the last chapter at all, it was really awful. I like this one better, its more angsty! Yes, I know they cannot remember anything from Gotenks, but it does not make sense if they do not. It is shorter that the other one, as you probably do not want me to go about ho much I did not like the last chapter, here's chapter 3.  
  
A Young Child sits here  
  
Gotenks dropped to the floor, Buu had escaped from this plain no walled prison and he had not, it was not fair. He had failed where the Idiotic Pink blob had succeeded. Piccolo had left five minutes ago in a mood, so he was stuck here all by himself, nothing to do. It was his fault Piccolo was in a mood, he had not been fast enough, he was weak. He picked up the pole from the broken shower and bent it in half. He was fed up of this life he wanted it too end. A bright light formed around Gotenks and out fell the two child warriors.  
  
Trunks looked at Goten with confused eyes, when he was fused with him he had been able to feel a great pain within him, it seemed to be screaming because of this torture, but it had suddenly subsided, it was not his pain that he had bared. It hadn't felt like that before, then again it had felt he was hiding something from him ever since they had entered the hyperbolic time chamber. Perhaps this was what he was hiding?  
  
"Goten, what's wrong? Trunks asked concern filling his cerulean blue eyes.  
  
"There's nothing, Trunks." 'Nothing you would understand' He said calmly adding the last part in his head.  
  
Trunks stared into those ebony black eyes; they were once filled with happiness and love of the world around him. Where they lacked happiness, it had been replaced by denial and the Love by grief. These eyes did not belong to his friend, these eyes belonged to a stranger.  
  
"Yes." 'I'm sure wouldn't understand.' Goten lied.  
  
"Well, I'm going to see if I can find Piccolo"  
  
"Fine."  
  
Trunks let his ki rise, and shot off in the direction he had last seen Piccolo.  
  
Goten sat down in the broken rubble of the entrance, that rubble reminded him of his life. It once had been perfect, and now one thing one bad thing had happened, it had hit like an earthquake shaking his world apart, his carefully balanced blocks fell down. He picked up a handful of the sand that had came from the time glass, he remembered doing this when he was Gotenks, he watched run through his finger and on to the floor, it reminded how all those people had died, if only had woke up earlier, then those people wouldn't. His mother would not be dead, if he was not such a coward his brother would not be dead, if he did not look so much like his father, he wouldn't bring Bulma to tears every single time she looked at him, if he had only been stronger of mind, he wouldn't have made so many fatal decisions as Gotenks. It was all was his fault! In his mind the sun had set for the first time and maybe the last, the night now engulfed the ways of his mind. In this night there was no moon or stars to guide the way home, to give that extra little gift of hope. His candle of hope was now just a burnt out wick. He needed someone to help him, but there was no one to help him they were gone. What happened if he did die here, he doubted he would ever leave this place, even when he died, his spirit would still wonder here looking for an exit to this prison. His life was a cycle of hurt, revenge, denial, nothing could stop it, it would go round in a continuous circle forever.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Trunks flew through the air, how could Goten bare such a great pain on his own? How could he live a life like that, being ever drawn to the black abyss of failure? He blamed himself, Trunks knew it, but really, Goten should have been blaming him. It was his fault if only he had not been so prideful and arrogant; all those people wouldn't be dead. His mother was probably dead now, Buu had probably killed her, but he might not have she might not be dead, he had to cling to that small flame of hope, even if she was dead they could bring her back with the dragon balls with everyone else. After Buu was destroyed, everything was going to be normal, Trunks thought. Yet there are memories and people find that the worst ones cling to them like a wet t-shirt while happy ones are like cherry blossom in a strong breeze. Memories can be the most prized possession we have or the most hated. A flame was in Trunks's heart, it was burning for all those lost in what he saw as this pointless struggle for power. Power, what good did it bring, if it hadn't happened so many years ago, then all of the innocents would not of lost their lives, but he to was one of those innocents, he was just one who knew how to fight. well. All because of his blood, if that blood did not exist, then a lot of things wouldn't have happened but then he would have Vegeta as father then. His father had only shown love to him once, inform that normal humans would, but he'd shown him when he'd taught him how to fight, he wouldn't have done that if hadn't loved him. He looked around he still had not seen Piccolo, where the hell was he! He focused his mind on trying to find him, he was back near where Goten was. Typical everything seemed to be against him lately.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Goten sat amongst the rubble, silver tears could be traced down his face. The shattered glass from time glasses was on sprinkled on the floor. They were a rainbow of different colours, in the light. Where was the light coming from, he could not see a source. He would definitely have to ask Piccolo that. A particularly long shard of glass caught his obsidian eyes; it reflected his long drawn, mournful face. He picked it up to see how many injuries his face had obtained in the long battle with Buu. Bruises were found on his jaw line, the black and blue colours reminded him of his mood, depression and hate. Blood had mingled with his tears and scratches were found every where. Nothing could come anywhere to his sacrosanct mood of despair, no mask hid it now, the lies fabrication was revealed to himself. He held the glass tighter in his hand, to tight, crimson blood ran down his fingers as the glass became further embedded in his hand. No pain was felt though, Goten thought it was strange. He drew to his arm and slit a small thin line, blood dripped out of it.  
  
Drip. The pain of Gohan's death left.  
  
Drip. His mothers death left him,  
  
Drip. Vegetas death left him  
  
Drip. His Fathers absence left him  
  
Drip. His Failure left him. The drops came progressively smaller and as they did he felt the pain sear in his arm, but It felt good, it felt relaxing. Slowly he rolled down his sleeve, covering the wound he had made by his own hand. No one had seen, no one knew, they never would. 


	4. Fusion of the Minds

Disclaimer: I do not Own DB, DBZ, and DBGT. A/N: Hey! I am glad someone reviewed the third chapter. (Hugs chibi-gotens- gurl) After this Chapter, I am going to go to the future coz I have not seen the Kid Buu saga yet, when I do see it, I will probably add another chapter for it. Sorry if this Chapter is short. It takes them along time to power up but it does not seem like that in this but does. Yes, I do know Goten probably was not able to think while he was in Buu, but then again.... Well here is the chapter. R & R! ^_^  
  
Fusion of the Minds  
  
Gotenks escape from the hyperbolic time chamber had been easy, then again surpassing the level of super Sayian 2 had not been.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*Flash Back*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Come on Goten we need more power we have to beat Buu, were Gunna make him regret he was even alive." Trunks said acting even more like his father.  
  
"Why don't we try my dad's trick?" Goten suggested, he knew that had a lot more power than anything he'd ever saw, even Buu.  
  
"Yeah, that the only good idea I've ever heard you come up with. You know that!" Trunks said surprised that he had not come up with that idea. Goten's eyes flashed with hurt, tears forming behind them, but he could not show Trunks them, he would be like trunks then, he would be weak.  
  
"Let's start." Goten said solemn.  
  
Soon the phrase 'Fusion Ha' chorused in the air and the two young boys performed the dance, a dance they would never do in public.  
  
A yellow light flickered around the fusion dance product. A smirk once again on his face. A scream escaped from his mouth as he powered up even further. Glimpses of his mother's death, his fathers energy signal reaching an all time high then disappearing never entering this world again, his other father telling him that his Brother was dead and Buu escaping flashed before his eyes. If one was able to look into them now they would of seen the hurt that Gotenks had been through but no one did, so no one knew how torn up he was inside. That when he felt it, he felt power of the pain and anger surge through him, it fuelled this power, hi already golden lengthened and his once pupil less eyes gained pupils again. The flames licked at his body "perfect!" he growled; only a few more days and Buu would meet this form.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*End of Flash Back*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Goten day had gone from bad, to fine, to great and then back to bad again all in a matter of hours. He had escaped from the empty jail, to finding out his brother was alive again, but his brother though he'd only been gone a few days had changed, it didn't matter if people died, they still changed. Gohan spoke only a few words to him, barely any of them were praise, no; he was too concerned with his sensei Piccolo, not him. Perhaps they power he had acquired had changed him, perhaps the battle had, perhaps that Father was gone again had, he didn't know. He did not want to. He had been so foolish to fuse in front of Buu, why had not he seen it coming; he had said earlier that Buu was on a par with Gotenks. Now he had been absorbed inside of him, the pink goo had eaten away his flesh and now he was in Buu's mind. His mind of nightmares. He and Trunks had split a few minutes ago, Buu had locked them both inside their minds, there was no struggle against him he had been to powerful, he had been to smart.  
  
Goten sat in the darkest corner of his mind, his knees brought up to his chin. Tears ran down his face, even more streaks could be seen from where other tears had rolled down his cheeks. Hundreds of television screens were around him, playing the worst moments over his life, when he had found his dad was dead, when he had seen his dad leave, his mother being turned into an egg, losing to Buu, pictures of Gohan losing to Buu, of how he thought Krillin, 18, Marron, Yamcha, His grandfather and the others had died. Their screams echoed in this dark cavern on his mind. Even if had wanted to leave, to run away from his fears he was to able to. Dark chains bound his legs and hands, an black mist seemed to hold him place. An image of Buu using his own attacks on Gohan came up now; Buu was sending this picture to him, he was sending him it to make him feel worse, he heard Buu telling Gohan that his brother hated him. Gohan did not believe one bit, but he wondered what if deep down he did hate him, what he was just going to destroy Buu and Goten along with him. He was wasn't he; he was just going to blow Buu to bits then not wish him back, he was going to let him go to hell. He was going to let him stay down there enduring its torture for eternity, his mother was as well, she had always favoured her first born and shed always would. Goten had always been last in every ones priorities. Clips of Gohan's defeat were showing now, how he'd was absorbed too, but his Father was there to now. He had no halo, he was there to rescue him, he was Goten's candle of hope, his guardian angel. No more images were on the screen now, there was silence in this abyss in Goten's mind.  
  
He heard a Scream of Trunks. He could see him right in front of him, struggling in the mist.  
  
"Help me Goten." Goten tried to move from his position, but the black bonds that bound him to the cold, damp floor prevented him from moving.  
  
"Goten stop playing in the dirt and help me!" Trunks yelled.  
  
"But Trunks can't you see I'm stuck."  
  
"No your not Goten. Help m. "Trunks was pulled further into what appeared to be Murky water. He had failed to free his friend, he was a failure.  
  
He was there again; at the look out, he was watching his mother be turned into an egg and crushed. He had failed again.  
  
His brother was fighting Buu and kept asking Goten to help him, but he was frozen he could not move.  
  
"Goten Help me!"  
  
"Please help me!" Gohan pleaded each blow breaking even more bones. Goten just stood there, he wanted to fight, he wanted to help his big brother.  
  
Everything went black as he watched his brother take his final breathes. No emotions were felt by Goten after that, he had been severed from Buu's mind, but he had not been severed from his own. He escaped once again from the blackness, only to wake up in the real world, but that was even deeper into this bitter void. Not even Goku noticed that son's eyes had become an sullen onyx chasm. 


	5. Lost Time and Dried Tears

Disclaimer: I do not own DBZ *whispers rocking backwards and forward in her personal Black Abyss*  
  
A/n: Does any one even read these? I don't care. This is kind of AU now, (Goten will have gotten stronger nor had his haircut) there was meant to be a poem in the last chapter, but I kind of forgot to put it in... oh well. It's in the future now. Unless I see the kid Buu saga, but I have not yet. Thank you for reviewing the last chapter Chibi- Gotens-Gurl, Punkizorange and Meru! This kind of took me too long to write because I got writers block, but I wrote two other chapters in the story. Sorry! This chapter dedicated to Phil. May he RIP. Well R&R!  
  
Lost Time and Dried Tears  
  
Goten sat on his bed, he looked at the photo beside his bed, it had been taken just before Buu had attacked. It was perfect that photo, no one had known hurt in so long and then that memory were given back to them with force than before. Perhaps that picture wasn't so perfect after all, he was in it and his father was missing. Though he and his father looked a like, Goten lacked one thing in common with Goku he wasn't so trusting. He wouldn't trust some one who was evil and now he didn't trust himself. His soul to him had been infected with darkness of pain; torn and ripped he was expected to go on as normal. No one had noticed his pain.  
  
Those three years had been like yesterday, the hole inside him never filling up. Three years ago was when he had turned from an innocent child to a guilty adult. (A/n not an adult but my English teacher was talking about how people have a turning point in there lives and they grow up. Therefore, I thought this could be Goten's! n_n) He had fallen from the light of hope into the dark caves of depression. He hadn't cried though not ever in those three years, it wasn't because he didn't want to but if he ever was caught they would find out and they would try to help. They would plunge there hand into the depths of his depression to help him, but he would end up pulling them in with him. His mother would worry about him constantly, his father too, but silently and Gohan would too. He did not want to put them through that; he wanted them to be happy. So instead of drowning them to he swam further down into his murky ocean. If one were to roll up Goten's sleeves, they would find out what he had been doing to keep the tears at bay. The scars up his arms were numerous, some faded in time others newer and redder.  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
  
Trunks sent another blow to Goten's abdomen, sending him hurtling into the ground. "What's with you today, Goten? You could have blocked that punch easily." Trunks protested, he wanted to spar Goten at his best, not when he was not trying.  
  
"It's been three years to the day you know?" Goten sighed picking himself up off the ground.  
  
"Three years since what?" Trunks was confused, he knew it had been three years since he had fought Buu, but it didn't seem like he was talking about that.  
  
"Three years since she died." Goten said barely above a whisper.  
  
"But Goten your moms back now. If you don't remember we wished her back with the dragon balls." Trunks was still confused why was he so upset over the anniversary of his mothers' death even though she had been wished back.  
  
"It's the memory though."  
  
"I know it is a bad memory. It was the first time we faced death, but you must dwell on the past." Trunks did not understand, he had not seen his own mother die before his eyes.  
  
"What if the past dwell inside?" Goten asked, his face grim, before taking to the skies. Thus leaving Trunks in an enigma.  
  
"Don't leave. . . Goten!" It was too late so trunks followed him into the sunset.  
  
Goten sat on the cliff face, his legs dangling off the edge. He sat so close to death yet so far. One wrong move and it could all be over. A tremor of the earthquake that had hit him three years ago resurfaced. He had came here every year on the anniversary that he had seen his mother die. The anniversary of his failure. This was the cannon where he had failed. Where his childish mind had shattered. Its world of rainbow colours faded into a black and white silent movie. A horror movie. He watched the sunset behind the pillars of rocks. Its golden flames of hope setting as the darkness of the world mingled with it, the sky turning a pinkish red. Those flames were reaching out for him and yet he could not grasp them, so he stayed as the night to its shadow hold upon half of the earth. The first bright star of the night could be seen on the horizon, a beacon in the dark to all those who were lost. Goten watched as more stars were speckled across the midnight blue sky. He smiled taking off back home, this was one of the things that had kept him from going insane.  
  
Trunks watched as Goten flew in the direction of home, why had Goten come to this place? Was he really that depressed? There was something that wasn't right, he was going to find out what was wrong with his best friend, and if he could help him, he would. With that thought, Trunks too took off home.  
  
Goten looked behind him and noticed a shooting star in the distance, well it would of looked like that to a normal human but he knew it was Trunks. He felt a surge of guilt run through him, he shouldn't have been so nasty to Trunks earlier. Somebody still cared about him. 


	6. I'm only Demi sayian

Disclaimer: I don't own *winces at bright in integration light held at face*  
  
A/n: Um, Gotens pushed to the edge. It's short coz my arm hurts from Tetanus.(evil needle *shudders at thought* ) Sorry it took so long as well...Thanks Chibi-Gotens-gurl and Raven Pan for reviewing! It makes me feel so happy, when I came online and I had a Fan fiction review alert, I was all smiley when I read it. ^_^The other reason this wasn't updated was because some idiot wiped all my work. Please R&R!  
  
I am only a demi Sayian  
  
Goten sat in his room, nothing felt right anymore. The emptiness had never left him; he had to live with it. Sometimes his mother would ask why he let Trunks push him around all the time. The only thing he could say was "Because." Because, there were a million reasons why but the main one was Trunks had always been there. He had never left him, he'd never forgotten him and he never would. The reason he had been in his room in the first place was Trunks, they had accidentally blown up Bulma and his mothers new dresses. They had not been happy about that.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Flash Back~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Trunks fired a Masenko Ha at Goten while he powered up a rival Ki blast, both hitting each other with the same force one shot, upwards while the other shot down towards to the ground. To be precise it was heading towards Bulma's brand new jet black air car, with her and Chi Chi's new designer dresses in. Before each of the demi sayians instincts could react, it hit the car, incinerating it and the two dresses on impact.  
  
"Oops." Goten murmured softly.  
  
"That was all your fault Goten!" Trunks yelled angrily.  
  
"But. . ."  
  
"You should of taken it like a man!" He continued causing the smaller Sayian to bow his head in shame.  
  
"I'm sorry." Goten sighed in defeat. He didn't want to lose his best friend.  
  
"Fine." Trunks smirked. Silence, nothing could be heard between the two warriors. It was uneasy, somewhat eerie to Trunks.  
  
"Come on we better get out of here before."  
  
"Trunks, where the hell is my car?!?" Bulma screeched. They were to late.  
  
"Umm sorry" Trunks said using the puppy dog eyes he had learnt off Goten.  
  
"You two just ruined my new DESIGNER dress. My one of a kind red designer dress, with matching heels and hand bag." Bulma carried on fuming at the loss of her outfit.  
  
Chi Chi on the other hand had her frying pan behind her back, her eyes narrowed and focused dangerously on Goten.  
  
"Goten, Honey, would you please come down here and tell your Mom what happened." Chi Chi said in a voice caked with fake sweetness and understanding. Goten knew this was lie only to well, for one could she the steel pan behind her back, shook his head.  
  
"Sorry Mom. I didn't mean too." Goten pouted from a safe distance.  
  
"Well as your not coming down, your grounded, your not going to see Trunks for a week." The raven haired woman screeched at her youngest son.  
  
"Aaaaawwwww!"  
  
"Same for you Trunks." Bulma shouted before retreating back inside ranting about how destructive sayians were.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~* End of Flash Back ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
He had not meant to do that. He did not want to destroy his mothers dress or Bulma's. It was an accident. He was only a demi sayian. He felt warm tears run down his cheeks slowly. He had no one to talk too. Hi mother was giving his the silence treatment and neither his brother or father had come home. Hours had passed and he was still lying under his covers curled up into a tight ball. Down stairs he heard the front door click open and his father say "Hi!" to his mother, then footsteps into the kitchen.  
  
"Oh Goku, do you think you could take me to the store. We've ran out of spice. We need some for supper!"  
  
"Hey, sure, Anything for my Chi Chi!"  
  
Goten heard the door once again close and felt his father ki level higher a bit showing that he was flying his wife to the super market. They'd forgot him. They'd never forgot him before. Gotens thoughts soon dropped their small collection of happy techno coloured thoughts and were once again replaced by the dull dark colours of his pain filled imagination. Another tide of tears ran down his young face, was he invisible to his parents? What if he became a ghost to everyone? What if he was already? His father was hero and his brother was too, but him no. He was recognised as a good fighter, physically he was but emotionally and spiritually he didn't think so any way. Even as Gotenks he was weak , he did not have a strong enough will power to bring himself out in the fused boy. It was all Trunks. He was not needed. All of the hero jobs were taken, no one would notice if he was gone.  
  
"Hey Goten." Gohan smiled entering the room. "Goten." He called again waving his hand in front of his brothers face.  
  
"Oh sorry. Hi Gohan how was your day?" Goten jumped startled at his brother appearance in the room.  
  
"It was ok. Nothing much happened. Are you ok, you look like you've been crying?" Gohan brushed his little brothers tears away. Goten hadn't put his usual mask of happiness and it was to late now, he was going to have to lie his way out of it.  
  
"It's nothing."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Well, you know you can tell me anything."  
  
"Yeah. I know."  
  
Gohan had noticed some thing different about his younger sibling. He'd noticed things before, he had not been the same since Buu. He seemed so distant, as if he was trying to hide something. Even when he had been absorbed by Buu, he hadn't been able to read his thoughts. Though he was busy having his own nightmares. There was something he couldn't place. 


	7. Feelings that were pushed aside

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Jimmy eat worlds song sweetness (I love that song! I know the lyrics aren't that particularly dark but they kind of tell his story.) but I own my mind, I think. . .  
  
A/n: Sorry it took me so long to update. . . Thank you to Chibi-Gotens-gurl and Master Vegeta for reviewing they meant the world to me! *smiles insanely* And thanks to my best friend Em for coming up with the chapter title and for always being there! R & R!  
  
Feelings that were Pushed Aside  
  
Goten sat in his and Gohan's room, the only light from the stars made it any brighter, but barely. He had sat in his bedroom every evening, in the dark , for weeks now. Punk music blaring out of his headphones, the lyrics he could understand, they made sense to him. As the tears ran down his face, he softly sang along. In a way it released his pain, it was vent.  
  
"and the sweetness will not be concerned with me. Yeah." That was true nobody would want to be concerned with him, nobody wanted a failure as a son or as a friend. " Stumble to you cry." Well that was what he had done, that was what he was doing now. Perhaps tears were weak. . . He switched off the walkman and wiped the tears from his dark eyes with his sleeve. His thoughts moved to what had happened this afternoon.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Flask Back~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "Let me watch my program, Gohan!" Goten pouted fed up of watching the news.  
  
"No, it's stupid!" Gohan said knowing exactly what Goten was going to watch, cartoons. Namely Other world Adventures. (A/n: not v. interesting, but I'm tired!)  
  
"Is not!"  
  
"Is too."  
  
"Is not!"  
  
"Is too!"  
  
"Will you two shut up. I've had enough of this. Both of you go sit in your room and think about what's happened." Chi Chi yelled, she was in no mood for arguments today.  
  
"Fine!" Goten snapped, storming off to his room.  
  
"Gohan you better go sit in mine and your fathers."  
  
"Yeah mom." He bowed his head in shame, he felt a little guilty, perhaps he should of let his little brother have the TV. Something was still wrong. It was to late for Goten to see the guilt in his siblings eyes.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*End of Flash Back*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Even Gohan had turned on him now , no one loved him , no one even liked him, he was just a weakling.  
  
A knock came at the door, tearing him out of the vortex of depressive thoughts he was swirling in.  
  
"Can I come in Goten?" It was his father, he was possibly the worlds maybe even the universes greatest hero.  
  
"Its not like I can stop you." Goten sighed. Goku walked in to the dark room, only just being able to make out hit sons outline.  
  
"Why you sitting in the dark?" Goku said flipping on light switch.  
  
" I wanna sit in the dark." He said shielding his eyes so they could readjust to the light, then he decided he still did want to sit the dark,. So once he had switched the lights off he returned to his bed and brought his knees up to his chin. An uneasy silence followed, Goten had never seen why his father was always so happy all the time. He had heard of many of the battle his father had fought, he knew he had seen people die in front of him, but how was he so unaffected? Goten could not remember when he had been like that. He couldn't remember that he had been like that only a few years ago.  
  
Goku couldn't take this silence, so he broke instead of Goten doing like he had wanted him too.  
  
"Son, what's wrong?"  
  
". . . life . . ." Goten replied in a hushed whisper barely audible to Goku.  
  
"How can life be wrong?" He asked puzzled.  
  
"My life is wrong."  
  
"No it isn't." You got your mother though Goku added silently in his head.  
  
"You don't understand, your not on the edge!" He yelled.  
  
"On the edge?" Goku face was once again confused.  
  
"You don't get it! You won't, your not me."  
  
"You don't mean your going to?" Goku couldn't finish that sentence he didn't want to lose his son like that, that was way that no one should die.  
  
"No, not yet. I have things to do first." Goten lied, he had never thought of that, but now thinking of it . . . no, that had no honour, but then again did he have honour left?  
  
"Are you sure?" Goku questioned, he loved his son, even though he hadn't been there for most of his life, in fact he had felt guilty about not being there for Goten in the first place.  
  
"Do I really look suicidal?"  
  
"No, I'll just go see if dinners ready." Goku said frightened of his son. He was more scared of what his son might do now, than if he had to face all his enemies at once.  
  
"You saw Gohan first, didn't you!" He said calmly, no emotion hidden in his voice.  
  
" Well, I went in their to get something and Gohan was sitting on the bed meditating. So I asked him what was wrong and he said that you two had gotten into an argument and Chichi had sent you up here. He looked pretty sorry though."  
  
"He's always comes first. He always gets his way." Goten pouted jealousy revealed in his voice.  
  
"Son, you no that is not true." Goku frowned shaking his head.  
  
"It is, it is." The calm voice returning. That calm voice was scaring Goku even more. Did he only have emotions that brought sorrow and despair?  
  
"Goten, are you ok? I mean I met you before Buu. You were happy then, but you've changed now."  
  
"Buu killed mom in front of me and I was stuck in side that white walled prison when he ate the others. You expect me not to be affected?" 'All I had was Trunks and Piccolo and neither of them were of any help.'  
  
"Goten, stop hiding where you fell!"  
  
"I'm sorry Goten!" Goku said sombrely, not fully understanding his youngest son's plea. He left the room quietly, while try to contemplate what his son had said.  
  
Goten looked back down at the ground he still felt the hole inside him, but it had shrunk, he did not know why but it had. The feeling that preoccupied him now was jealousy, his brother was the one that was loved not him, he had to find a way for his parent to love him too . . . 


	8. A thought held for too Long!

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ *sighs*  
  
A/n: I really did not like the last chapter at all, it had something missing in it. I don't know what. . . so anyways I decided I needed to have a change of direction with this! Sorry it took me so long to update U_U . Also I know that Piccolos asexual but it sounds stupid saying it or piccolo all the time. Please review. Please don't flame. Thanks for the anonymous review. Who ever that was. . . ^_^  
  
A Thought held for too long  
  
Piccolo flew through they sky looking out for his old student Gohan he had to tell him this information. Even Dende knew nothing of this, no one did. Where was his student, he had not be able to find him at all by sensing him. So the next best thing was searching by air. He had tried asking Goku, Chi Chi and Videl where he was but he still hadn't been found, he had finally found him. He was meditating under a tree. This was one his favourite tree (you know the one in the cell saga, in Gohan's memories, that one!) it still had the hole in it he had made when he was little and now that had gotten even bigger since Goten accidentally sent a Ki blast into it. He smiled at the memories, those were great times. They had been so happy then, then again, Goku had never been around and Gohan had missed his Father more than anything in the world. Now though life didn't seem as perfect as then, it hadn't been perfect then but it had fallen even further from perfection now.  
  
"Gohan." A familiar voice pulled him out of his memories.  
  
"Oh, Hello Piccolo. How are you?"  
  
"I'm fine, but I haven't come here to talk about me."  
  
"Then who or what have you came to talk about?" Gohan smiled, what had he came to talk about, it wasn't like Piccolo to come down from the Look out.  
  
"Goten." The Namek said quietly.  
  
"What's wrong with him?" The demi sayian said frowning, he had noticed something wrong with Goten for a while perhaps Piccolo knew what he had been doing.  
  
"I don't know how tell you this softly, but Goten's been harming himself. ." Piccolo said looking down at the ground feeling guilty that it had taken him this long to tell Gohan. If it had been any longer Goten may have done something more than just cutting his arms.  
  
"What do you mean by harming him self?"  
  
"I mean he's been cutting his arms."  
  
"How long for?" Gohan's voice was tainted with worry what had his little brother been doing to himself.  
  
"Since we were trapped in the hyperbolic time chamber." Piccolo sighed. He felt so guilty he should have stopped it straight away.  
  
"Since when. Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Gohan shouted angrily, it was not very often he got angry; he had a right to know though this was to with his little brother.  
  
"I didn't know how to put it. I was."  
  
"Look I don' t have time for this now, I'm going to find him now." Gohan said shooting off into the sky, heading for home.  
  
Piccolo looked down at the ground , he was a failure as a sensei to Gohan and as a friend why didn't he tell him what Goten had been doing sooner. He had a bad feeling about today and now Gohan probably hated him. He had to make it up to him.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Goten hugged his legs, where was Gohan, he had said that both of them would go to the park, it would just be like old times. Now he was over two hours late. He didn't want that was why he hadn't come. He was just some stupid annoying little brat to him. He was a waste of space, some useless little piece of Junk that just hung around for no reason. He was the woolly jumper that an old relative had knitted you but was never used because it didn't fit in with the rest of the clothes. No one wanted him, he'd never be wanted. His brother was needed by loads of people, he was a super hero and then, he was a failure. His family were all hero's or great and he wasn't. he was the black sheep, he stuck out like a sore thumb. He would not fit in anywhere. His family were different to him and if he ran away and found a new family to live with, they may find it a bit weird that he could change his hair colour at will and ate more than any human. People feared what was different and eventually that fear was going to turn into hate and then they would send him away too. He wanted to be alone. To be alone, meant there would be now pain. He could distant himself from everyone else like he did now. He would only have himself to rely on. There would just be him, but he couldn't do that because some one would find him. So what options did he have left? Death or to live life as nothing had ever happened. He could hold that mask of happiness up for only so long, until he broke. He didn't want o hurt the others even more now though, he didn't want them to see him break down crying, he never wanted to hurt anyone. Putting some one in pain was wrong, but then in some cases it was the only thing to do. Death was his only option. He took a piece of paper from his brothers note pad and started writing a note.  
  
Dear everyone, I guess your wondering why I've suddenly decided to take my own life. You guys all have some one now and I don't mom you have Dad, Gohan you have Videl and trunks you have all your new friends from school. You never really realised how Buu affected my life. You never saw your mother killed in front of you and were expected to live with it. I was seven years old and you expected me to save universe. You weren't that old when you had too. I was always some extra not really wanted. So decided to take me away from your lives. You wont have to worry about me anymore. I'll be gone and then you can keep on living. I'm sorry I caused all of you so much pain. Trunks you can have all my action figures, I'm sure you'll enjoy them. Mom the pictures for you and dad and Gohan, you'll find them under my bed. I'm sorry. Lots of Love Goten x x x  
  
His writing joined up just the way his Mom liked it to be. He put the piece of paper down onto his bed, sighing with tears in his eyes. He took the blade from his pencil case and held it to his wrist.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Gohan flew quickly through the sky what if he was too late, what if Goten had done something drastic. What if he had. no he couldn't think like that. He could finally see his house, his breathed a sigh of relief but the feeling in his stomach had not gone. Was Goten ok?  
  
Please review, and don't flame me. ^_^ 


	9. Unknown Secrets and Pain relief

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ *shakes head*  
  
A/n: . . . Thanks demonstarchild for reviewing Unknown Secrets and Pain relief  
  
Gohan burst through the wooden door knocking it off its hinges. He saw Goten sitting on his bed, watching the blood drop from his wrist; crystal tears ran from his eyes and down his ever-paling cheeks finally rolling of his chin.  
  
"Goten." Gohan sighed ripping a strip of fabric from his fighting gi. He gently took Goten's wrist and wrapped the orange fabric tightly around the cut. He wrapped his arms around his brother and gently rocked him.  
  
"I'm so sorry Goten." His dark eyes on the verge of forming tears too. He didn't want to lose his little brother. Goten reminded him so much of himself at that age. He had seen Goten isolate himself from Trunks. He hadn't spoke to him as much now, Goten really hadn't spoke to anyone that much anymore. It was lucky Piccolo had known. What if he hadn't told him, he would be here now, no he didn't want to think like that. He just wanted to know what was wrong.  
  
"Sorry for what?" Goten looked up, his once innocent eyes now intense and dark, they were more like Vegeta's than anyone else's was. They still held some sort of purity though, something that was still childlike in them. He frowned. "What are you sorry for?"  
  
"I'm sorry for not being there for you Goten and for being too concerned with Videl and Pan. I should have been there for you; I am your big brother. For caring to much about my studies too." Gohan held his brother closer. He never wanted to lose Goten. He owed him his life in a way. Through those days when Gohan had not been able to cope with his dads death, Goten had been there reminding him of him. Not in the way everyone would of thought Goten should of. They had all been saddened by how much Goten looked like Goku, it had brought Bulma to tears a few times. Gohan though saw it as a blessing though, he reminded him of all the good times with his dad. Goten's eyes had sparkled with innocence and naivety of Goku's. There was something else in his eyes though a wonderment of every single thing in the world, he had more sense of the world than his father though. He knew who to trust, he had a good sense of what people were like deep down. It was something in those ebony eyes that revealed a persons true colours. It was hard not to be happy around Goten then. Even if Gohan had been sad when he had walked into the house, Goten's massive grin could make anyone smile. That was gone now. Instead of Goten making people smile, it was people trying to make Goten smile.  
  
He looked down at Goten now, something had changed again, his dark ebony eyes had closed, he seemed to be contemplating something or another. Gohan continued rocking him back and forth. He was almost convinced that Goten was asleep apart from the fact that he was still sniffing, though almost silently. His pale skin had streaks from where he had been crying. A single tear rolled down Gohan's cheek and feel onto Goten's nose. He felt him turn in his arms.  
  
"Don't cry. I do not want you to cry. You shouldn't be sorry. . ." Goten had turned around to face Gohan and had brushed the tear away from him.  
  
"Yes I should. I shouldn't have ignored you."  
  
"No, I should be sorry. I should of realised that doing this would of hurt you and everyone else." He shook his head, making his black locks shake slightly.  
  
"Goten, it was everyone's fault."  
  
"NO it wasn't it was mine. I should have taken it like a man."  
  
"You know that isn't true, squirt." Gohan ruffled his brothers hair. Goten smiled a little. Gohan loved his brother smile, it would brighten anyone's day.  
  
"You were never as stupid as me." Goten said looking down at his wrists. Gohan sighed and smiled grimly. "Your to smart to do that."  
  
"No I wasn't. . ." Gohan slowly pulled the bands off his wrists, if you looked close enough you would be able to see two thin red lines, that contrasted against his usual pale peach skin. It was thin and faded though, worn down by time, an old scar. Goten looked horrified for a moment but then it passed and looked thoughtful once again.  
  
"When?" Goten uttered the single word in a whisper, though curiosity ran through his voice.  
  
"When dad died, not actually it was after that. It was when Mom found out she was pregnant, with you, I didn't think I was going to be needed. Kind of funny really considering the situation now. I was still really upset from Dad's death. I just didn't see the point in me being around. So I decided that it wasn't worth it. It was my fault dad died and now mom was going to have another child. She didn't need me to be around though. So I did the same, as you. I didn't expect anyone to find me. No one wanted to speak to me because of what I had done. I had killed father. If anyone had found me, I had always thought it to be Piccolo, Mom or Krillen. It was Vegeta though. It was the only time that I'd ever seen him show concern to anyone. I never thought it would be me that he would show it to. He took me back home before Mom got back from Bulmas and Bandaged my wrists. He never told anyone, he just said I was foolish. I deserved that comment though. He told me that my family loved me and cared about me and that 'kakarotto would not be pleased if I suddenly appeared on snake way." Gohan smiled a little, he could just picture his dad's face if that had happened.  
  
"So I'm not thick?"  
  
"Who told you that?"  
  
"Trunks, I think he was only joking though." Goten smiled a bit more, Gohan felt a jolt of happiness as the old smile that lay on his little brothers lips started to return again. Gohan noticed that the bed covers were covered with blood and he'd would have to clean them before his mother came back.  
  
"Come on, lets get you cleaned up and then we better sort out this mess." Gohan smiled warmly leading his brother to the kitchen to find something to help Goten's wrists. 


End file.
